A craven vile calumny not unlike the Battle of Monmouth

[Legacy User]

Dear sirs:

In my humble estimation, yesterdays obliquy from the scurrilous she-weasel M. Tomlin would historically rate near Gen. Lee's ignoble and infamous embarrassment at the battle of Monmouth. This is indeed ironic since on that occasion it was the so-called patriot as the purveyor of ignominy.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Monmouth

Fortunately for the esteemed Gen. Washington, the Marquis de Lafayette was able to salvage a stalemate on the battle pitch in the dreadful July heat. It is also fortunate that affairs of honor remedied Gen. Lee's disgraceful behavior not only in battle but in his offence to Gen. Washington remediable via the superior marksmanship of Mr. Laurens. If it were only possible to substitute field generals for battlefield general so easily the disgrace of my good name. Indeed the humiliation of these Pitts-borough Steelers has left my once buoyant spirits crestfallen.

Your twenty-first century non-approbation of dueling ground restitution and Mr. Rooney's typically Celtic stubborn appointment of coaches as papacy afford this writer scant remedy. But I assure you that that great Philadelphia inventor Ben Franklin and I are working on a time machine and that soon I shall settle this affair of honor the eighteenth century way with extreme prejudice.

Your obedient servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

[BethlehemSteel]

Back to the future Mssr WPitt

[K_C_]

William Pitt The Elder BRINGING THE FUCKING HAMMER AGAIN today.

Excellent post, sir.

[Legacy User]

Dear sirs:

In my humble estimation, yesterdays obliquy from the scurrilous she-weasel M. Tomlin would historically rate near Gen. Lee's ignoble and infamous embarrassment at the battle of Monmouth. This is indeed ironic since on that occasion it was the so-called patriot as the purveyor of ignominy.

Even more ironic in that the latest Patriot hero went to school at Monmouth....

Unless that's what you were implying and I missed it as I'm not fluent in intelligent speak.

Anyway good luck on the time machine

[Legacy User]

Dear sir:

You have brought to my attention that the enemy hero of that travesty, C. Hogan, matriculated at Monmouth. You may add that observation that to my poisoned well of calamitous ironies. I feel a dyspeptic ague coming on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YX6-9On ... Fo_OKlNaaB

[tunch]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

[Legacy User]

I love this guy.

[Orangesteel]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

Hahahaha

[Legacy User]

Mr. Lit,

Your avatar has not gone unnoticed by myself and my court associates. This foppish image of a "gentleman" donning eighteenth century ruffled Seinfeldian puffy shirt does impress me more as a scandalous French libertine than a proper English gentleman. I pray he is not be a rapscallion from the Duquesne family for we might have to reenact the Six Years War and specifically Point State Park (Ft. Duquesne/Fort Pitt) on this forum. I await your response and clarification.

Your humble servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

[Legacy User]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

And yet the moment wasn't "too big" for him.......but it supposedly was for sammie Coates (auburn) and cobi hamilton (arkansas).

[R_S]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

And Sammie Coates played in stadium that holds 90,000 but looks like a high schooler when trying to make a play on a ball.

[stillcajun]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

And yet the moment wasn't "too big" for him.......but it supposedly was for sammie Coates (auburn) and cobi hamilton (arkansas).

THIS^^

I thought this was a cop out but as someone mentioned in earlier threads, the Pats look at the big picture and seem to consistently have guys ready to contribute because they practice with the starters and also they start working them in early during the season not waiting for an injury because then if someone goes down they don't enter the game green.

Most other teams do the opposite which is a player doesn't see the field until an injury takes place.

[Obviously]

Mr. Lit,

Your avatar has not gone unnoticed by myself and my court associates. This foppish image of a "gentleman" donning eighteenth century ruffled Seinfeldian puffy shirt does impress me more as a scandalous French libertine than a proper English gentleman. I pray he is not be a rapscallion from the Duquesne family for we might have to reenact the Six Years War and specifically Point State Park (Ft. Duquesne/Fort Pitt) on this forum. I await your response and clarification.

Your humble servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

Dear Lord Chatham,

I am a huge fan.

Yr Obdt Servt,
Obviously

[Legacy User]

Dear sirs:

Indeed, I have noticed as well that the willingness to surrender so easily at the molly-house Ft. Duquesne had been unmatched for cowardice until our Pitts-borough Steelers decided to play zone against these New-England Patriots. One wonders whose jollity was heartiest upon learning the plan of their foe, B. Belichick or Gen. Forbes.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fort_Duquesne

Your obedient servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

[Legacy User]

Mr. Lit,

Your avatar has not gone unnoticed by myself and my court associates. This foppish image of a "gentleman" donning eighteenth century ruffled Seinfeldian puffy shirt does impress me more as a scandalous French libertine than a proper English gentleman. I pray he is not be a rapscallion from the Duquesne family for we might have to reenact the Six Years War and specifically Point State Park (Ft. Duquesne/Fort Pitt) on this forum. I await your response and clarification.

Your humble servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

Dear Sir,

Were you beneath my stature I would not have bothered to author a response, but I perceive a certain equality between us which moves me to supply you with some explanation. The image over which you have turned your thoughts is none other than myself at leisure in my study. You will observe that I am not in formal attire. The vest is but some taffeta ornament purchased for scholarly repose and speaks not of foul pursuits or love of excess, unless it be proposed that virtue is an extreme. As for my provenance, I cannot deny that some amount of education was pursued under the guidance of the good Spiritans on the Bluff, but I assure you that while my mind may have been given some form by French letters, the matrix from which my heart is cast is thoroughly Anglo and faithfully Saxon.

In kindest friendship,
Still Lit

P.s. It is a mere trifle of incidence when the essence has been so beautifully stated, but I fear you may have counted the skirmish with the French one year short of its duration.

[Legacy User]

I feel dignified just reading this thread

[lifelongsteel]

Hogan played college football in a stadium that seats........

3,200.

And Sammie Coates played in stadium that holds 90,000 but looks like a high schooler when trying to make a play on a ball.

Football player vs. athlete

FWIW Ayers would have had no problem with the moment

[Legacy User]

Mr. Lit:

I hope you will forgive my impetuous tone. Despite our British triumph at the Forks of the Ohio, in my heart I remain an Enlightenment Francophile. It is only because of certain developments with the Jacobins, and most specifically Mr. Robespierre and the Marquis de Sade, I remain wary of recent developments. Abagail Adams informs me that while in Paris, the widower Jefferson has become quite the libertine, or as these 21st century moderns, would say, buck-wild. I approach all Gallic notions now with a mixture of fascination and opprobrium. I trust that given the recent disposition of King Louis and Marie Antoinette, that you are keeping your head on straight.

From your correspondence, I detect you are familiar with the etiquette of affairs of honor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dS79uxNFoHw

M. Tomlin has informed me that he has appointed Mr. Tunch Ilkin as his second. Upon successful completion of the Royal Time Machine (Mr. Eli Whitney informs me that with a few more mules in the flux capacitor power train, we will have enough power to advance the requisite two centuries forward), I intend to avenge the sullying of my good name by Mr. Tomlin and I would request your assistance as a second consistent with the expected procedures and affectations need to resolve this unfortunate dispute with M. Tomlin and A. Rooney.

My courier will send you a copy of our machine that you may suitably employ. I would greatly appreciate your assistance as a second in this matter. When we arrive in Pitts-borough together in 2017, I think we should meet in a location suitably gentrified. A brewpub of your choice in East Liberty would seem to meet these qualifications.

Your obedient servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

[Legacy User]

The Elder is a $ poster

[Legacy User]

Mr. Lit:

I hope you will forgive my impetuous tone. Despite our British triumph at the Forks of the Ohio, in my heart I remain an Enlightenment Francophile. It is only because of certain developments with the Jacobins, and most specifically Mr. Robespierre and the Marquis de Sade, I remain wary of recent developments. Abagail Adams informs me that while in Paris, the widower Jefferson has become quite the libertine, or as these 21st century moderns, would say, buck-wild. I approach all Gallic notions now with a mixture of fascination and opprobrium. I trust that given the recent disposition of King Louis and Marie Antoinette, that you are keeping your head on straight.

From your correspondence, I detect you are familiar with the etiquette of affairs of honor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dS79uxNFoHw

M. Tomlin has informed me that he has appointed Mr. Tunch Ilkin as his second. Upon successful completion of the Royal Time Machine (Mr. Eli Whitney informs me that with a few more mules in the flux capacitor power train, we will have enough power to advance the requisite two centuries forward), I intend to avenge the sullying of my good name by Mr. Tomlin and I would request your assistance as a second consistent with the expected procedures and affectations need to resolve this unfortunate dispute with M. Tomlin and A. Rooney.

My courier will send you a copy of our machine that you may suitably employ. I would greatly appreciate your assistance as a second in this matter. When we arrive in Pitts-borough together in 2017, I think we should meet in a location suitably gentrified. A brewpub of your choice in East Liberty would seem to meet these qualifications.

Your obedient servant,

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

May I suggest the back patio of Kelly's on Centre Ave in East Liberty? The patio is private and affords the space needed to be traversed prior to turning and firing one's arms.

There is also a goodly amount soul music to be found on a self-playing music machine and the women are as tattooed as they are nubile.

[Legacy User]

Dear sir:

Despite my reservations about French libertines, I must say I do fancy the company of wenches in a fine ale-pub establishment. However, the frolicking must occur post-duel. Much like a boxing pugilist from the mid-20th century I believe it is bad luck to shoot one's wad on the eve of a battle when one's energy must be reserved to take a potentially life saving shot.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VK4Wk_8PbcI

Your obedient servant,

William Pitt the Elder

[SteelBull]

OK, I can't tell you guys how much I appreciate the time and effort (and intelligence) that went into this discussion.

Need a diversion at the moment prior to moving into draft prep. For what little that is worth.

Thanks Gentlemen!!! Cheers.

[Legacy User]

Dear Mr. Lit:

I hope this letter finds you doing well. In the event that your time travel was successful, I do want to apologize in advance for not arriving at our meeting in East Liberty as we discussed.

Our first attempt at time travel was only a partial success. The combination of Franklin's kite and key, along with a twenty mule team only supplied the fluxe-capacitor enough power to advance me to December 2, 1985, not quite into the 21st century.

While my journey did not afford me the opportunity to resolve this affair of honor with M. Tomlin, it did prove fruitful in other ways.

My arrival on that date was a most curious coincidence. I found myself on the front lawn of the home of Mr. John Clayton, who cordially invited me in to discuss football. Alas, he informed me that the Pitts-borough Steelers were slogging through a most mediocre season, and I was crestfallen. But he tried to raise my spirits by having me watch a football game on his tele-vision, an amazing contraption I found most agreeable and astounding.

After sharing his fine ale and strangely green and delicious Iberian-American foodstuff called "guacamole", we started watching this on his tele-vision:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yscC_Wg1u4&t=37s

I was flabbergasted by the skills of this field general, Daniel Marino. He was single-handedly beating an invincible, undefeated team with flair and finesse that reminded me of Gen. Lafayette. Then Mr. Clayton explained that Mr. Marino had matriculated at the University of Pitts-borough. I inquired, why in heaven would the Steelers not draft such a fine Lombardian (double-entendre intended) specimen, and Mr. Clayton explained that they passed on him for a line-man so that he fell to these Miami Dolphins in 1983. This calumny was egregious enough but my temper proceeded to boil over when he informed me that Mr. Clayton himself had proposed trading Mr. Clifford Stoudt and a second round pick to the Dolphins, but the stubborn Celt Rooney rebuffed this suggestion. Needless to say the ignominy was not just limited to the senseless non-recruitment of Mr. Marino, but by the recruitment of Mr. Malone in his place.

Upon hearing this, I became more incensed than I was at M. Tomlin. In good haste, I proceeded to the office of Mr. Dan Rooney, set of pistols in hand, and challenged him to a duel on the spot. Mr. Rooney, having just witnessed Marino's Monday Night Football performance and his own playoff debacle the previous years' playoff, pleaded nolo contendre, and apologized profusely. Being a gentleman of honor, it would of course been unseemly to proceed with the duel after the apology and Mr. Rooneys subsequent fellations of my Master John Goodfellow, or what a Yorkshireman refers to as his "silent flute". Having my outrage and tumescence sufficiently assuaged, I returned by to the late 18th century still offended, but sated.

I have instructed Mr. Forbes and a company of masons and carpenters to construct a waterwheel on the rapids of Ohiopyle. It is my hope that the combination of kite and key, a 20-mule team and this hydro-electric contraption will afford enough giga-joules of power to propel the fluxe-capacitor to our intended date and destination in 2017. My courier will continue to inform you of my progress.

Your obedient servant:

William Pitt the Elder
First Earl of Chatham

[R_S]

The Elder is a $ poster

Talking about yourself huh?

[Legacy User]

The Elder is a $ poster

Talking about yourself huh?

It's not me. I'd love to take credit for this stuff....it's incredible.

But no, not me.

[Legacy User]

Who among us has not had a time travel fantasy involving the 1983 draft?

[Legacy User]

Watching Lit and William Pitt have a conversation is out-standing.

[Legacy User]

So entertaining...

[drmalba]

A new literary subgenre, age of enlightenment era erotic football fanfic. God bless the internet.

[Flanker]

These poasts are great... I've been reading all the boards related to our existence for almost 2 decades. We deserve a good troll every once in awhile. Very well done and I tip Tomin's hat too you.