Steelers-Browns Postgame

[swissvale72]

STEELERS-BROWNS POSTGAME

I’ve oft-described our Pittsburgh Steelers madness thusly….”We don’t enjoy these games; we just suffer through them and hope we’re happy at the end.”

Last night’s game was a prime example of the applicability of this assessment to our individual and collective Steelers fandom. There was VERY little to enjoy about this 139th convening of Turnpike rivalry between Pittsburgh and Cleveland. In fact, don’t know about you asshats, but my enjoyment was basically limited to three plays, all Pittsburgh Steelers touchdown….one at the very outset of the contest, one near the end when I believe that most of us were losing hope, and one in between.

Sure, there were other moments of expectation, ruined by idiocy and fumble by Gunner Olszewski, who I personally hope never again dons the uniform of the Black & Gold, and then the idiocy that we’ve come to expect from the braintrust, playcalls that lose yardage when on the cusp of tying field goal range or put the ball in the LEGS of our quarterback when a pickup of two yards would come close to icing the game.

Watching, I rarely display my mania anymore, hardly ever go ballistic. I’m more likely to do so when watching completely alone. But now, with Mrs. Swiss in the room, listening to her Amy Wambach/Glennon Doyle podcast, and my dog, Jazzy, begging for food and wanting me to throw her balls…outbursts on my end are met by a combination of human acrimony or canine barks and growls…so I support my team in silence.

And for last night’s game, still suffering from gout, I countered doctor’s orders and had a solitary IPA…and felt better this morning. The prevailing question of today is this…..
“How…DAFUQ…did we win this game??” Face it, offense wasn’t’ going to win it. Defense had to do it. AND…let’s face this as well. If we’re Browns fans today, we’re livid, now we’ve been hosed by a non-call on Peezy, Jr. at game’s end. Both hands were grabbing jerseys, draped on the receiver, and NO, that ball was NOT uncatchable. BUT…we’ll take it.

Oh, too bad about Nick Chubb, though don’t really give a fuck. What kind of last name is “Chubb” anyway. Chubb’s exit from the game didn’t bring the same unbridled joy as did the TB12 injury leading off the ’08 campaign, spawning Father George’s greatest t-shirt ensemble ever (which I wore to Foxboro, and ’58 can back me up on that), or…the Carson Palmer injury during the ’05 Wild Card game against the Steelers, whereupon the Bungals QB literally watched the rest of the game from his La-Z-Boy at home. But think about it. Both of those injuries were seasons concluding with Steelers Super Bowl victories. Could it be?? Could it? Could the Chubb downfall be the same precursor???

At any rate, we suffered through last night, were immensely happy at the end, and now it’s on to Vegas for a Sunday Nighter versus the Raiders. Ever the optimist, I think the Steelers offense becomes unleashed and we leave the desert at 2-1.
Until then…..

[jebrick]

Good stuff.

I will admit my only real outburst of the night happened when Gunner did his idiot toe-tap on the kickoff. Just made my dogs move to another room. The rest I suffered in suffering silence of the Dammed. I am just happy today because I know a Bengals fan to rib.

[Jizz Mop]

Good write up Swiss

I almost quoted you in the game thread…..

Re: enduring these games

I’m always sarcastic anymore when I type “looking forward to being entertained.”

How does Gunner NOT KNOW to let that ball go OOBs AND to make matters worse, tip toes as if he’s trying to get two feet in in bounds like a WR on a sideline patten?

Does anyone on this inept coaching staff actually teach these players anything?

No more Gunner. His muff last year was the difference against NE and this fumble almost cost us the game. As I stated in the game thread, KP did him no favors with the dump off but still. Fuck this guy.

Fucking Steelers are hard to watch. Our offense is god awful. And Canada should be shit canned ASAP but we all know Tomlin needs a scapegoat to deflect blame.

God damn our coaches suck dick.

[langer]

The badness is part of the fun.

Like MST3K. It’s a bad movie with bad actors like Coach Mike the Clueless Wonder.

Allopurinol for that gout.

[swissvale72]

The badness is part of the fun.

Like MST3K. It’s a bad movie with bad actors like Coach Mike the Clueless Wonder.

Allopurinol for that gout.

Been on it for 10 years, Langer....still gout-infested though.

[Jizz Mop]

The badness is part of the fun.

Like MST3K. It’s a bad movie with bad actors like Coach Mike the Clueless Wonder.

Allopurinol for that gout.

Been on it for 10 years, Langer....still gout-infested though.

Lay off the cheese, meat, dairy, shellfish….pretty much everything and you’ll be fine. Oh and as you know…no alcohol or Koolaid.

[langer]

The badness is part of the fun.

Like MST3K. It’s a bad movie with bad actors like Coach Mike the Clueless Wonder.

Allopurinol for that gout.

Been on it for 10 years, Langer....still gout-infested though.

Sorry to hear that man. It helps me.

[Ice]

This one really took the whole "suffering through" part to the next level.

[Thrillsseeker]

Great write up Swiss. My wife has learned over the last 12 years that I suffer through the games. Rewatching the wins is when its joyful for me. I’ve used your very verbiage to explain it to her while telling her I’m mot fucked up, there are plenty of “others” like me out there. Am trying not to yell at the tv so much as I get older but last nights game wasn’t very successful at keeping my noise lvl low.

Been on Allopurinol for 20 years. Not true about what foods to stay away from. I can eat seafood 3+ times a week without a flare up. Red meat on the other hand, is definitely my trigger. Know your diet and what your trigger foods are. Feel for ya. I’d rather take a punch to the face than have a flare up. Good luck brother. Not even joking, fresh cherries do wonders to stop/fix a flare up. Ate two pounds once in an hour on a weekend I couldn’t get 2nd medication from a pharmacy. Flare up gone the next day.

Seeing Gunner last night and remembering him screw us last year against the Pats while being at the game made me hate that jagoff even more. That guy needs shit canned along with Canada. Coaching in general needs evaluating seeing Gunner on this roster is Unreal and pathetic. I too give zero shits about Chubb and hope to see the Browns and Watson super tank into the losers they are. As someone that has had more than enough knee injuries and surgeries its tough to watch his injury from last night. Brutal.

[LakecrestSteeler]

Good stuff.

I will admit my only real outburst of the night happened when Gunner did his idiot toe-tap on the kickoff. Just made my dogs move to another room. The rest I suffered in suffering silence of the Dammed. I am just happy today because I know a Bengals fan to rib.

Between you and @swissvale72 sounds like we need a Dogs of Steeler Fury thread with pictures.

I always chuckle at the thought of the dogs getting excited or knocked out of a deep sleep because a random zebra call.

Surprised nobody has their dog for the Avatar.

No dogs for me in my stupid purgatory life situation.

[955876]

No more Gunner.

When you keep physically challenged JAGS on your roster who aren’t good a their actual position but do menial things well like cover kicks and bring ice cream to practice you will reap what you sow.

When you keep him, you’ll end up having to use him.

How many more times will Jibbs need to get kicked in the face by this horse before realizing he should take a different approach?

[Deebo]

Good write up Swiss

I almost quoted you in the game thread…..

Re: enduring these games

I’m always sarcastic anymore when I type “looking forward to being entertained.”

How does Gunner NOT KNOW to let that ball go OOBs AND to make matters worse, tip toes as if he’s trying to get two feet in in bounds like a WR on a sideline patten?

Does anyone on this inept coaching staff actually teach these players anything?

No more Gunner. His muff last year was the difference against NE and this fumble almost cost us the game. As I stated in the game thread, KP did him no favors with the dump off but still. Fuck this guy.

Fucking Steelers are hard to watch. Our offense is god awful. And Canada should be shit canned ASAP but we all know Tomlin needs a scapegoat to deflect blame.

God damn our coaches suck dick.

Want to know the messed up part?
STeve Sims, a guy that Tomlin should be comfortable with bc he played with us last year is on the Hou practice squad. Guy who filled in fine when needed
That's such an easy replacement that I was screaming for all pre season

[MJG75]

As always, great stuff, Swiss.

I'm with you and think we bust out next weekend against the Raiders. Typically a bad matchup for Tomlin teams, I think this time we show up and walk away with the W.

If we could only figure out the run game (on both sides), this team would be light years further than it is. But nah, still seem to have lots of issues there with the line and personnel. It's the way Tomlin apparently wants to play the game, but frustratingly can't seem to make it work consistently.

I'm going to go with we have a D consisting of playmakers, but lack the discipline to form into a truly great defense. Discipline is a thing that to my fan eyes appears to be a lost art on our team (maybe for many teams, dunno, as I rarely watch any football these days outside of the Black and Gold). Thankfully, those playmakers stepped up just enough to give us the win last night.

Sorry to hear about your gout, and that allupurinol doesn't seem to be effective for you. I messed around with diets, cherries, apple cider vinegar, and all the rest, but none of it was very effective. Finally got real with a doc who put me on allupurinol (high dosage) combined with Colchicine. The latter was necessary to get all that mess out of my system, the allupurinol has kept me flare free ever since we figured out the right combo. I just do the allupurinol now, and I eat and drink whatever the fuck I want. Sorry yours is troublesome, brother.

[955876]

Good write up Swiss

I almost quoted you in the game thread…..

Re: enduring these games

I’m always sarcastic anymore when I type “looking forward to being entertained.”

How does Gunner NOT KNOW to let that ball go OOBs AND to make matters worse, tip toes as if he’s trying to get two feet in in bounds like a WR on a sideline patten?

Does anyone on this inept coaching staff actually teach these players anything?

No more Gunner. His muff last year was the difference against NE and this fumble almost cost us the game. As I stated in the game thread, KP did him no favors with the dump off but still. Fuck this guy.

Fucking Steelers are hard to watch. Our offense is god awful. And Canada should be shit canned ASAP but we all know Tomlin needs a scapegoat to deflect blame.

God damn our coaches suck dick.

Want to know the messed up part?
STeve Sims, a guy that Tomlin should be comfortable with bc he played with us last year is on the Hou practice squad. Guy who filled in fine when needed
That's such an easy replacement that I was screaming for all pre season

Jibbs stubs his own toes annually with brain dead roster decisions.

Guys like Gunner always look good in preseason. That is because they work their asses off during practice because they lack the physical talent of their peers.

And in preseason games they are going against grocery baggers and/or defenses that are not scheming to stop them.

But when the games matter and the defense isn’t full of grocery baggers and have schemed accordingly guys like Gunner get revealed as who they are.

And who they are is future grocery bagger.

[SteelerDayTrader]

…..sounds like we need a Dogs of Steeler Fury thread with pictures…..

Dear god no…..

[stillthere]

I will admit my only real outburst of the night happened when Gunner did his idiot toe-tap on the kickoff.

I had a few more than just that. Mostly they were directed at actual play calls on the offensive (I mean that both ways) side of the ball. I am really trying to give Canada the benefit of the doubt but it becomes harder by the hour. Perhaps the Steelers should play the Canadian National Anthem on repeat in the facilities so the Matt can remember that there should be an "O" in there somewhere.

[swissvale72]

Here's the deal with gout. I've been on alluperinol for about 10 years, and gout was kept at bay. Couple weeks ago though, my son was home from NYC for a week. I had dinner with him 6 of 7 nights. We had burgers three of those nights, meat lovers pizza two more nights, then some Mexican rib eye and a couple 20 oz. Dos Equis at a Mexican joint on the remaining night. Then, after driving him back to the Upper West, he ordered me a double bacon cheeseburger from Shake Shack. So, prob no prescription shield was going to keep the gout gremlins at bay.

Today...my staff came up with 10 Mineo's pizzas, shipped from Squirrel Hill.

[langer]

Here's the deal with gout. I've been on alluperinol for about 10 years, and gout was kept at bay. Couple weeks ago though, my son was home from NYC for a week. I had dinner with him 6 of 7 nights. We had burgers three of those nights, meat lovers pizza two more nights, then some Mexican rib eye and a couple 20 oz. Dos Equis at a Mexican joint on the remaining night. Then, after driving him back to the Upper West, he ordered me a double bacon cheeseburger from Shake Shack. So, prob no prescription shield was going to keep the gout gremlins at bay.

Today...my staff came up with 10 Mineo's pizzas, shipped from Squirrel Hill.

Stress triggers it for me sometimes, plus a few good NEIPAs.

Another thing to blame on Coach Mike Tomlin.

[MJG75]

Damn, Swiss, that's enough to gout it up, without doubt. Sounds like good times, though.

I'm not on any specific diet, in fact the reason I ended up sticking with the Doc that I did is that he said most of the time diets don't work. And, trust me, I tried them, and they didn't work at all for me. The only thing he restricted me on was beer for about a year and a half. That was tough, but I toughed it out. Now, I can't eat tons of rich food like I used to, I just can't. My body says "Nyet", and when it says that enough times, well, I had to listen. The one battle I won with my body though was booze. I drink whatever I want, and when my body objects, I just say "F you", and move on. So yeah, my food intake is a lot less than it used to be, and less spicy and rich (those Mineo's pizzas sound tempting though!), but my booze intake is as good as ever. I'm keeping fingers crossed though. I only got it under control about 3 years ago, and hope it stays that way.

[Ice]

…..sounds like we need a Dogs of Steeler Fury thread with pictures…..

Dear god no…..

Be careful, there are folks who'd use this response as the reason to start it. Pretty sure on Stillers there was that one sort of crazy poster that posted all sorts of dog photos....

[bradshaw2ben]

Good write up Swiss

I almost quoted you in the game thread…..

Re: enduring these games

I’m always sarcastic anymore when I type “looking forward to being entertained.”

How does Gunner NOT KNOW to let that ball go OOBs AND to make matters worse, tip toes as if he’s trying to get two feet in in bounds like a WR on a sideline patten?

Does anyone on this inept coaching staff actually teach these players anything?

No more Gunner. His muff last year was the difference against NE and this fumble almost cost us the game. As I stated in the game thread, KP did him no favors with the dump off but still. Fuck this guy.

Fucking Steelers are hard to watch. Our offense is god awful. And Canada should be shit canned ASAP but we all know Tomlin needs a scapegoat to deflect blame.

God damn our coaches suck dick.

Want to know the messed up part?
STeve Sims, a guy that Tomlin should be comfortable with bc he played with us last year is on the Hou practice squad. Guy who filled in fine when needed
That's such an easy replacement that I was screaming for all pre season

Eli Freaking Rogers. How does Eli Rogers not have an NFL job? He looked great in the spring. No idea why he was dumped by the Steelers.

[drmalba]

The badness is part of the fun.

Like MST3K. It’s a bad movie with bad actors like Coach Mike the Clueless Wonder.

Allopurinol for that gout.

Been on it for 10 years, Langer....still gout-infested though.

I feel you...get it at least 1-2 times a year....recently while I was travelling this summer. I'm sure you're also just as sick of hearing it's the "Disease of Kings" as I am

[jeemie]

I'm not going to blame the ST coaches for Gunner's mistake.

He's a veteran who's been doing special teams for years. He SHOULD NOT NEED to be instructed about the kickoff rules. he should know them.

I tend to agree with B2B...on the kickoff, Gunner had a brain cramp and forgot he was on the field as a kick returner, and his pass-catching muscle memory kicked in.

Not sure how you coach something like that out of a person.

[K_C_]

I'm not going to blame the ST coaches for Gunner's mistake.

He's a veteran who's been doing special teams for years. He SHOULD NOT NEED to be instructed about the kickoff rules. he should know them.

I tend to agree with B2B...on the kickoff, Gunner had a brain cramp and forgot he was on the field as a kick returner, and his pass-catching muscle memory kicked in.

Not sure how you coach something like that out of a person.

Do you realize how fucking stupid someone playing professional football would have to be to let that happen?

A brain cramp?

What, was he thinking about a fucking movie he's recently seen? The cocksucker barely plays and should be trying to make the most out of his very few opportunities.

Dude was probably on the field 5 times and fucked his offense HUGE twice.

[jeemie]

I'm not going to blame the ST coaches for Gunner's mistake.

He's a veteran who's been doing special teams for years. He SHOULD NOT NEED to be instructed about the kickoff rules. he should know them.

I tend to agree with B2B...on the kickoff, Gunner had a brain cramp and forgot he was on the field as a kick returner, and his pass-catching muscle memory kicked in.

Not sure how you coach something like that out of a person.

Do you realize how fucking stupid someone playing professional football would have to be to let that happen?

A brain cramp?

What, was he thinking about a fucking movie he's recently seen? The cocksucker barely plays and should be trying to make the most out of his very few opportunities.

Dude was probably on the field 5 times and fucked his offense HUGE twice.

I'm not condoning what he did...I'm just blaming Gunner for the whole thing.

I'll blame the coaches for letting him see the field again, and Tomlin for not cutting him immediately after he made the mistake.

But not for the mistake itself.

[Quixotic]

Indeed. But we certainly have some outside linebackers to be proud of. Interesting that one was a DE and the other a Tight End (as I recall) in college.

These days, when I start to complain about the Stillers, my wife holds up her hand (as in “talk to the hand”) and says, “we do what we do.”

[stillthere]

I'll blame the coaches for letting him see the field again, and Tomlin for not cutting him immediately after he made the mistake.

I am pretty sure you cannot cut someone when they are in concussion protocol.

[jeemie]

I'll blame the coaches for letting him see the field again, and Tomlin for not cutting him immediately after he made the mistake.

I am pretty sure you cannot cut someone when they are in concussion protocol.

If he had been benched after the kickoff debacle, he wouldn't have been concussed.

[jeemie]

Good write up Swiss

I almost quoted you in the game thread…..

Re: enduring these games

I’m always sarcastic anymore when I type “looking forward to being entertained.”

How does Gunner NOT KNOW to let that ball go OOBs AND to make matters worse, tip toes as if he’s trying to get two feet in in bounds like a WR on a sideline patten?

Does anyone on this inept coaching staff actually teach these players anything?

No more Gunner. His muff last year was the difference against NE and this fumble almost cost us the game. As I stated in the game thread, KP did him no favors with the dump off but still. Fuck this guy.

Fucking Steelers are hard to watch. Our offense is god awful. And Canada should be shit canned ASAP but we all know Tomlin needs a scapegoat to deflect blame.

God damn our coaches suck dick.

Want to know the messed up part?
STeve Sims, a guy that Tomlin should be comfortable with bc he played with us last year is on the Hou practice squad. Guy who filled in fine when needed
That's such an easy replacement that I was screaming for all pre season

Eli Freaking Rogers. How does Eli Rogers not have an NFL job? He looked great in the spring. No idea why he was dumped by the Steelers.

https://www.steelernation.com/2023/07/2 ... lacklisted

If you believe the rumors (and Rogers himself), it was because Ryan Switzer joined Ben's Bible Study group and kissed his ass (although the story that details this is so chock full of errors, it's hard to believe it. The story places COVID...and Ben's injury...as prior to the 2019 season (although it could have been referencing the rib injury Ben suffered in 2018). Rogers' tale acts like it was a no-brainer that he should have been retained over Switzer...as if Switzer was some walk-on in 2019 when he'd been with the team for two years while Rogers was recovering from his injuries.

The conventional wisdom is Switzer was retained over Rogers because he also returned kicks.

Maybe it was the ice cream...who knows?

[Deebo]

I'm not going to blame the ST coaches for Gunner's mistake.

He's a veteran who's been doing special teams for years. He SHOULD NOT NEED to be instructed about the kickoff rules. he should know them.

I tend to agree with B2B...on the kickoff, Gunner had a brain cramp and forgot he was on the field as a kick returner, and his pass-catching muscle memory kicked in.

Not sure how you coach something like that out of a person.

Do you realize how fucking stupid someone playing professional football would have to be to let that happen?

A brain cramp?

What, was he thinking about a fucking movie he's recently seen? The cocksucker barely plays and should be trying to make the most out of his very few opportunities.

Dude was probably on the field 5 times and fucked his offense HUGE twice.

I'm not condoning what he did...I'm just blaming Gunner for the whole thing.

I'll blame the coaches for letting him see the field again, and Tomlin for not cutting him immediately after he made the mistake.

But not for the mistake itself.

I'm certainly blaming the ST coaches. After being clean in the pre season it's been nothing but continual fuck ups for this unit.
I'm confident we'll have a TD return against us in the coming weeks...